always thinking about the production of hamlet i saw at the pop up globe a couple of years ago where everyone was costumed in typical shakespearean dress and the set was fairly minimal BUT! they gave polonius an iphone. it was like a running gag that his ringtone kept going off when hamlet or claudius were trying to speak and they would get more and more impatient with him every time. the cast had perfect comedic timing and it was such a perfect modernisation of typical shakespeare humour

but oh my God. the nervous laughter that rippled through the audience when his phone went off behind the tapestry. the heavy silence that followed, interrupted only by the incessant chime of polonius’ ringtone and a muffled “shit, shit!” while he tried to decline the call. it keeps ringing even after hamlet has already put his sword through him. hamlet picks it up in his bloody hands and ends the call, puts it back in polonius’ grasp before turning back to face gertrude.

hands down the best set up and pay-off of any addition to a shakespeare play i have ever witnessed

Fendi no

a small star war about getting older

Happy May The Fourth, dear friends. I hope today has been full of happy memories <3

last day to reblog

you now you want to.

Gonna have to wait a whole year if you miss this.

Fine

IT’S GONNA BE MAY

that time of the year again

DELETE THIS POST

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

*clicks play in morbid curiosity*

*hammers reblog button*

I think I find this post every April Fools Day and I am so happy that I do

WHAT THE FUCK

i missed it last year so i’ve had this scheduled for an entire damn year

Great, now I need to clean snorted water out of my keyboard.

happy Thursday the 20th

I’d have to wait months or even years for another chance to reblog this, so why the fuck not?

next days you can reblog this on a Thursday the 20th

August 2015

October 2016

April 2017

July 2017

September 2018

December 2018

June 2019

February 2020

August 2020

You know, just in case you wanted to set your queue for the next 6 years

TODAY

Heritage post

Is anyone else mildly unsettled by the implication that this is going to be the last Thursday the 20th

Don’t worry, here’s the next 5 Years of Thursday the 20ths!

This is the only Thursday the 20th? This year?

Happy Thursday the 20th

that’s enough emotions for a whole year. ciao

The earlier in the year you reblog this the better it gets

And yet there are those who doubt him and question how he gets around the entire world in one night…

santa’s creed

this has been on queue since january 2nd and it was worth every minute

I’m queuing this on December 26th I’m ready for this

You better watch out

You better watch out

You better watch out

YOU BETTER WATCH OUT

I fully believe the queen is dead and they just don’t wanna deal with a funeral before Christmas so they’re keeping her on ice (aka life support) till spring.

apparently the entire country has to do a 12 day long mourning and the BBC is legally banned from putting on any comedy show during that week AND they have to shut down the London stock exchange for one whole day... now I'm not saying they're weekends at Bernie's-ing that colonizer to keep the stock exchange open, but....

I think you're right

[ID: headline that reads "Queen has 'entered a new phase' and we 'may not see her until February', say experts. Below that a sub header that says "Her Majesty is unlikely to be seen in public for the rest of the year, according to royal experts." End ID]

the funniest thing in the entire pirates of the caribbean series is definitely that one scene in At World’s End where they have parlay but davy jones is part of it, and rather than have him stand in the shallows or something they get a big bucket of water and have in stand on it on shore

who thought of that idea? who thought “put davy jones in a bucket of water” and had the guts to suggest it aloud? and then who went “hey that sounds like a great idea!”

at some point someone told davy jones their idea was for him to stand in a bucket of water and he agreed to it

*stands majestically in a bucket*

ok but notice the trail of buckets behind him meaning he walked from the ocean through three other buckets of water before he got into the one hes standing in

It’s even funnier when you consider how he must have figured all this out in the first place.

Some folks are asking “well, if he can avoid the no-dry-land curse simply by standing in a bucket, doesn’t that ruin his whole motivation?”, but he’s not on dry land here.

The parley takes place on a sandbar - which, for the unfamiliar, is a temporary “island” of sand deposited by breaking waves, unconnected with the shore, that spends most of its time submerged, being exposed only at low tide.

What Jones is doing here is rules-lawyering his curse. Can you imagine the trial and error he must have gone through in order to determine that this would actually work?

“Okay, do islands count as dry land? How about parts of the shore below the high tide mark? Reefs? Shoals? What if I stand in a pool of water on a shoal? Does it have to be seawater, or will any water do? Does it have to be a natural tidepool, or can it be something artificial, like a bucket?”

What I am saying is that there must have been a process.

Pretty sure that this implies that the reverse - a bucket of sand, floating on the water (big bucket with just a bit of sand), would qualify as dry land. That’s absurd, so I’m pretty sure that his lawyer pulled a fast one over the curse governor.

It may be absurd, but the text of the film bears it out. Davy Jones can sense the presence of his heart while it’s at sea, but not while it’s on land (indeed, that’s why he buried it on land in the first place: to break his connection with it) - yet placing the heart in a simple jar of dirt conceals it from Jones’ awareness just as surely as burial on land does, even if the jar is on a boat at the time. Suitably prepared vessels filled with dirt absolutely count as dry land for the purpose of Jones’ curse.

Then the reverse should also be true. If he buried it in a jar of water, no matter how far inland it is, he would be able to sense it. So by this logic, any container of seawater counts as not dry land, ergo, the bucket is a perfectly viable loophole.

Not necessarily. It’s traditionally a lot easier to accidentally get whammied by a curse than it is to weasel around it - I figure that’s why he’s using multiple layers of indirection here. He’s forbidden to set foot on dry land, but it’s technically not dry land (it’s a sandbar, a non-permanent landform exposed only at low tide) and he technically didn’t set foot on it (he’s standing in a bucket of water). It’s entirely possible that either one of those things alone wouldn’t make the grade.

okay but this all raises one further, very important question: if it’s specifically “dry land” he’s forbidden from, what about wetlands. can Davy Jones fight you in salt marshes? can he throw down in a peat bog?Swamp Battle?

This is the quality content I come to Tumblr for.

could he step on land if his shoes are wet?

No matter how ridiculous PotC gets I will love it. Especially when it results in conversations like this

What if he crawls around on his hands and knees, with his feet raised slightly into the air? Can he walk on his hands? Can he ride around in a litter or a wheelchair?

can he be in a wheelbarrow?

What if he flies over dry land? Like in a hot air balloon, or in the claws of a giant bird?

What if he’s carried by two swallows using a strand of creeper?

European swallows or African swallows?

this whole thread reads like a conversation between these two:

In fact im not entirely sure that it wasn’t their idea in the first place

It probably was.

I was joining random dating sites and i came across one called “Top Tier” which was apparently only for very rich people with high IQs. Only, there was no vetting process so i figured it was just for pompous assholes who thought they were top tier.

I signed up to see what it was like. The color scheme of the site was yellow on black. You had to select one of three options indicating if you were single or not. I don’t remember what the first two were, but the third one was, “you can go to hell,” which meant that for whichever reason, you weren’t interested in anyone. If you chose this option you couldn’t even search the site, so I backed up and chose a different option.

I found Uma Thurman on the site and jokingly sent her a date request, but she actually accepted and now I had a date with her set for tomorrow evening. I was in a panic because I didn’t want to date Uma Thurman. In the dream, she was known for being mean. I was still stressing about how I was gonna break this date, when I woke up.

again, I really need to read the usernames on this fucking site

this dude legitimately needs to die pronto

what is it that causes all billionaires to develop a god complex

The funniest thing about Star Trek: The Original Series is William Shatner being completely unaware of how bisexual his portrayal of Kirk was coming across – especially when you look up interviews with the rest of the cast and it becomes clear that Shatner was literally the only person on set who didn’t pick up on it.

The second funniest thing about Star Trek: The Original Series is how angry Shatner gets when people bring this up.

My favorite thing to learn was that Shatner does not watch his own acting. He has not seen TOS.

oh my GOD

I WILL ALWAYS REBLOG DYLAN

i rewatched revenge of the sith