there aren’t enough posts going around about the swedish cryptid known as the skvader which is a rabbit with pheasant wings and also a very good boy.

like this one dude just made a fake taxidermy and spread it around as a hoax for a good ass while and it lead to this really cool fantasy creature and i am genuinely dissapointed that it never gets used in anything

THE BOY

Rabbirds, by the amazing @tkingfisher/Ursula Vernon (source).  

The lack of skvaders is particularly frustrating when you realize it forms the third point of a wonderful cryptid trifecta.

You got the jackalopes, which are rabbits with antlers.

And you got the wolpertingers, which are rabbits with antlers and wings.

And then… what? Do you escalate? That’s unbalanced, those two rabbit cryptids don’t have the same number of extra things, the wolpertinger is clearly the jackalope But More.

BUT with the skvader on the other side, balance is restored. Antler rabbit, winged rabbit, winged antler rabbit. It’s a classic Venn diagram of imaginary lapine beasts, and it’s only complete if you acknowledge the fucking skvader.

Good thing Ursula’s got our back, at least.

This is a really excellent point and I applaud your advancements in Cryptid Theory.

Gentleman, if I might add:

yes you may add this

I think balance in crypdids is VERY IMPORTANT.

[Video description: Jerma speaking into his webcam.

He stares directly into the camera in silence for several seconds, eyes wide and lip curled as if seeing something repulsive. End video description.

Image description: a collection of tumblr tags that read:

"jesus christ put those things away" "me when im telling my friend about a recipe but mid sentence i spot a devillish imp sitting atop my fridge" "he looks like he's gazing into the face of an incomprehensible deity" "he's waiting for you to ask for the recipe" "he's waiting for you to select a dialogue option" "he beamed the hummus recipe directly into my brain" "jerma turning back into a mannequin as the fay spirit animating him leaves to find a new vessel" "This is something that the green goblin would say in the final week before succumbing to the gas" "i think i understand why people think this guy isnt normal" "you know how it is with hummus"

End ID]

Eating slime mold by MaximumMoustache

im laughing because whoever filmed this obviously filmed it to see the slime mold move and then this slug comes and ruins everything

she just wanted a tasty snack dont be mean to her!!

i found the video it’s from and it’s called “Myxomycetologists nightmare…”

slugs are often a mycologist’s nightmare lmao

Every few steps she looks back to check on her little kitty cat 🐈🥺

You still there?

yeah

You still there?

yeah

You still there?

yeah

Hi! I made a silly illustration for the speeddraw from last week. Please enjoy! If you're looking for a high res version to print, several Drawfee patreon tiers offer our high res renders for that month and all months prior since we went independent :)

sometimes you just wanna respond with shit like "that must be a very comforting fiction to you"

The worst thing you can do, as someone who has recently realised they are transfem, is to let terves and transphobes convince you cis women will never accept you.

I was told that when I came out everyone would reject me. That I would find myself isolated from the world, and from other women especially, who would react to me with horror and revulsion.

In reality, within the first months of coming out, in no particular order:

My sister's reaction on my coming out was, "Right, so I have a sister instead of a brother. Cool. I'm taking you clothes shopping tomorrow."

A friend, when she learned I am a woman, immediately invited me to her women-only, girls-night-out birthday party the following week.

Another friend, when a friend of hers expressed doubts about my gender, immediately shut them down and reaffirmed I am a woman.

I went camping with a group of friends, and we had two tents, one for the boys and one for the girls; I was unsure as to which I should enter, to which a girl friend responded by grabbing me and physically dragging me inside the women's tent.

In the women's bathroom at a movie theatre a random woman, whom I'd never seen before and haven't seen since, stopped me as I was going into a stall, to warn me there was no toilet paper in there, because she'd just used the last of it.

All of these, and more, some from friends, some from complete strangers. All within a few months, as a trans woman who hadn't started medical transition yet, and was very visible as being a trans woman.

I've had some people reject me, true, but the vast majority, including almost all cis women, accepted me as a sister with open arms.

Cis women are cool. It's terves who are bigots.

I needed to see this today

can u see me? just checking,,

wow, for some reason, less than 4 months after she made her account, my girlfriend got silently banned off Tumblr! thats crazy!

i wonder what my black trans girlfriend did to get herself banned! oh well im sure there was a really good reason for it

this website is a fucking joke.

if you arent furious over this in light of the recent downsizing of tumblr's staff to about 25, then you havent thought yet about how purposeful you have to be to single out a single black trans person for being black and trans out of a userbase accounting for 300 million daily logins.

because of something existential that they dont like about her.

no email or anything by the way. no notice of deletion, she just attempted logging in and couldnt. there is no consistent terms of service to account for this, it is very blatant transmisogynoir for this to have come to pass.

im sure they could come up with some legal bullshit reason to cover themselves, but think about it. 25 staff. thats fewer people than a highschool classroom, as my other partner put it so well, and they still decided hers was the most dangerous blog on tumblr. alright man.

my gorgeous gorgeous girlfriend appreciates all the kind words, and wanted me to let you all know that she's doing okay! she's taking it with stride, and has still got jokes about it despite how shitty it is. she'll probably post something about it sometime soon, but for now don't fret too much about her mentals!

maintain the angry energy towards staff and the shameless bigotry that permeates their moderation, by all means, but don't worry yourself over my girl. she's very strong.

Yeah Mr. Darcy’s proposal was a complete turd and a half but you gotta understand. You got your life together. A good career, stable income, retirement plan, all that shit together. And you meet this girl. And she’s everything. Clever, outspoken, funny, calls you on your bullshit. Grade A cutie, right? And she doesn’t go out of her way to spend time with you but she’s nice, and sometimes you catch her looking your way in a way that makes you think you might have a shot.

But her family. Holy shit.

First off, it’s p much ALL women, and mostly UNMARRIED women, which at this time means of something happens to her dad then you’re financially responsible for like. Four grown ass adults, potentially forever

Because mom in law is DEFINITELY gonna need someone to take care of her when dad in law kicks it, and they have like. NO money. So already you’re accepting that if all goes well, you’re gonna be one random old bag’s retirement home. That’s expensive and exhausting, yeah? Imagine asking someone on a first date knowing that if they say yes and things go good her high-strung chihuahua mother is gonna move in with you. IMAGINE.

And girly’s other sisters. Well, one is a sweetheart, yeah, so she probably won’t be an issue, but that still leaves three more, and two of those ones are INSUFFERABLE. Never went to school, dumb as rocks, spend cash like it’s toilet paper

And while one of the two is young still and might grow out of it the OTHER one is actively torpedo’ing her entire family’s reputation by wandering off with random dudes and chasing ass. She’s never gonna work, she can’t build connections, she’s a fucking sinkhole, and she’s being led on by the same goddamn con man ass leeching tit who’s been bleeding you dry while telling anyone who’ll listen that your family is full of ratty thieving bastards.

And if he dumps her after a week- WHICH YOU KNOW HIS BITCH ASS IS GONNA- you’ve got a SECOND UNMARRIABLE GROWN ASS ADULT TO PROVIDE FOR. And you KNOW she’s gonna be a tantrum-throwing little shit about it, and it’s not like you can lock her in the basement or something, you’re gonna have to bring her fucking. Everywhere. And give her an allowance and shit while she contributes zero, because again, she NEVER GOT EDUCATED AND HAS NO MARKETABLE SKILLS. She’s not even good to TALK to. FUCK

And you’re looking at this girl’s father like “please for the love of fuck get your spawn under control, marry them off, get them working on their résumé, learning to sew or be nursemaids or manage staff or SOMETHING, yall got no money and one foot in the grave” and that old man just laughs like “haha yeah, what can you do. lol”

So you’re looking to the mom and finally it’s making sense how she got that twitch in her eye and as MUCH as she is you’re starting to realize she’s the SMART one, desperately throwing her armloads of girls at random men like they’re a bunch of fucking lifeboats bobbing around a sinking ship, like yes Jesus Christ sweetly that life boat IS old and ugly and kind of boring but for FUCKS SAKE PICK ONE

And you look back at this girl who is ALSO REFUSING THE LIFE BOATS BY THE WAY and god damn it she’s still the most radiant thing you’ve ever seen so fine, fuck it, Christ alive, you’ll do it. You’ll shoot your shot. She’s everything you’ve ever wanted in anybody abut it’s not even just about that anymore, it’s about being her best fucking shot at a future, and even if she doesn’t like you all that much she’s still gonna say yes and that might break your heart a bit knowing it’s about the money but who knows, maybe it will at least be civil, or companionable, and even if she doesn’t LOVE you at least you’ll know she’s well and cared for

And so you’ll do it. You’ll take on the neurotic stress mess mother in law, the absent father, the broke ass wingnut no brain no money no future airhead sisters, the bad mannered relatives and the embarrassing behaviour and the impending future of sharing your entire shit with a clown parade of freeloaders, you’ll risk it all and accept the absolute certainty of financial ruin and emotional exhaustion for the rest of your whole ass life and you’ll make your own family deal with it too, you’ll do it, you’ll fucking DO IT, you stupid lovesick motherfucker

And so you go to this chick like “look. Your whole family’s a shitshow. You’ve got fucking nothing and you’re gonna die on the street. But for some reason- and I don’t get it either- I’ve fallen in love with you, and I wish I didn’t, but I did, so I’m telling you that whether you like me or not, I’ll give you everything. I’ll give you everything even if it’s the dumbest shit I ever done. Fuck my stupid Baka ass, I’ll marry you.”

And she looks at you- having heard or considered absolutely none of your months-long internal debate and monologue- and goes “The fuck did you just say about my family, you son of a bitch?”

And the shock of that is enough to jolt you back into a reality where you are able to actually hear and process what just came out of your damn mouth And yeah

Yeah, I think I kinda get it

(and the prev tags)

#Pride and prejudice#fuuuuuuuck#Yeah you both kinda stupid#I forgot some shit don’t hate me#Also yes I forgot Mary but I’m gonna say Darcy did too just to cover my ass

…Yeah. That’s just about it, isn’t it?

(And then she nukes him from orbit. Which, despite the absolutely correct summing-up of the background, is still deeply satisfying.) 😏

Most of my lack of sympathy for Darcy in this situation is that Lizzie initially does manage to keep her shit together enough to think "I should be nice" about turning down this bolt from the blue proposal. Before he really unzips and starts taking a piss on her entire family, she feels genuinely bad because she's about to hurt his feelings.

Like, she hasn't done anything to make him think she's actually interested, and critically, neither has he. Our man appears to have come to the conclusion that he can't beat this out of his system and is just going to have to bite the bullet about thirty minutes before he goes to propose. Even by the atrophied standards of the day, there has been precious little that might suggest courtship beforehand.

Mr. Collins*, whose matrimonial hamhandedness had him basically going down the line from sister to sister to their faces like it was a fucking speed dating meet-up, at least gave everyone a heads up and said, "Hey, I think the right thing to do here would be to try and make a match in-house, and I'm coming down to shoot my shot." When he got with Charlotte, it was after a short acquaintance, but he made it plain that he was looking for a wife.

So Lizzie has zero chance to deflect or decline Darcy's attentions in a way that's going to spare him embarrassment entirely. Like that man just marched in (?), announced he was in love with her (???), and gave the most dogshit proposal in recorded human history (?!?!). Even after she's genuinely mad at him for reading her whole family for filth and acting like he's history's biggest martyr for falling in love with her (her! of all people!), she still manages to be like "Oh, wow. I'm... flattered. But no, thank you. Sorry for your life. Sounds like this whole thing shouldn't last too long, though! You don't sound too happy about any of this!"

And then Darcy pitches a hissy! ("And this is all the reply which I am to have the honour of expecting! I might, perhaps, wish to be informed why, with so little endeavour at civility, I am thus rejected. But it is of small importance.")

And that's when Lizzie spends like an entire page nuking him from orbit. That man had an opportunity to be like "Pack it in, boys, we've made a social blunder." and instead decided to pretend he didn't just spend fifteen minutes acting like God's poorest meow meow for trying and failing to fall out of love with the woman standing in front of him.

I mean, whomst among us hasn't immediately shot ourselves in the other foot instead of putting the safety on, but hard yikes, man. I don't think you spent as much time actually thinking about stuff as you think you did, Darcy! I think you might have just been stewing on it instead!

He doesn't actually calm down enough to be like "Fuck. Fuck, why did I say that. Fuck my stupid brain and fuck my stupid life." for like. Weeks.

*Who also fucking forgot Mary, who'd have been at least on paper a very suitable wife for a clergyman.

my general position on public nuisance is "you should do your best not to irritate or inconvenience other people unless there's a good reason" and then litigate the "good reason" on a case by case basis. i think that's the best anyone can do. the definition of "good reason" varies wildly depending on context, your background, culture generally, what data you have as a participant or a bystander, and local laws, and all three of these things are relevant factors

for example it really does lower my level of reactive, irritable stress with my neighbors to know their names and general schedules. i don't know why but it really does bother you less if Kyle Upstairs is having a party a little too late and you can hear Bulletproof through the ceiling, as opposed to if you're on year three of living underneath some anonymous fuckhead you want to kill. it's like oh Kyle's cousin is visiting and they're just chilling out maybe they lost track of the time. this makes all the difference. as usual the best advice is to form community with the people around you no matter what, even if you are entirely self-interested it will benefit you in the end. well that's all I got

i discovered who brennan lee mulligan was today

Mustang was very brave to build his team with a chronically-single french man, a guy who was born for IT in a world without, a guy who's definitely from their equivalent of New York, two orphans that are homeless by choice, his not-wife that he has a suicide pact with, and Vato Falman

In a move surprising absolutely no one, JKR has now added asexual people to her list of people to mock and bully online. While obviously this is nowhere near the amount of vitriol she aims towards trans women in particular, it's continued evidence of her bigotry and yet another reason not to support or engage with the new HP show if her continued transmisogyny still wasn't enough.

Anyway fuck HP and fuck JKR.

every character is aroace now actually. deal with it

Don’t….. fuckin power wash your roof. Don’t let anyone power wash your roof.

Friend, from the tone of your words, I feel like you’ve just learnt a hard lesson here…

Fortunately no, it was an easy lesson I learned when I was seven when my dad was power washing the driveway and I asked if he was going to power wash the roof next and he explained to me that it would damage the roof because it was meant to handle rain and snow, which is never going to be as hard as a power washer.

Lots of people are learning this the hard way this year though. It’s a new scam. Someone knocks on your door and offers to wash your roof for two hundred bucks. “Damn, that’s a pretty good price,” you think, knowing that roofs require a huge chunk of change. The guy power washes the roof and leaves. It was a cash transaction, and he didn’t leave contact information, so when your roof starts leaking during the first rain, you have no one to contact to sue for damages and you’re stuck on the hook for replacing the roof yourself, which you either do yourself (cost of materials and many hours of your time) or you hire someone to do for you (which runs into the tens of thousands of dollars, an amount people normally can’t just drop).

Lots of new homeowners don’t know this stuff, and it would definitely behoove them to research it, but until they have the time to do that, I’m here to say: Don’t power wash your roof.

Where do people go once tales end? Also where do old birds go to die? Why don't old ones fall like stones from the sky?

(running my fingers along the spines of my vast analog media collection) hmmm. what do i want to watch tonight? hmmmm... so many options. such a tough choice.

the vhs i found in the woods that plays a different video of myself dying horribly each time i rewind it: play me again babygirl