Hc that Ford gets a job at a local community college as a physics prof after he and Stan are done sailing around the world and fulfills his destiny as the eccentric professor he was always meant to be
And he quickly gains a reputation amongst the stem students as That Professor
I bet his ratemyprof reviews would be insane:
“He didn’t grade any of our homework until the end of the semester, but he brought something called a ‘plaidypus’ to class and let us pet it. Her name was Dorothy. 5/5”
“He constantly ranted about how ‘triangles are the most untrustworthy shape’ whatever that means. Also he doesn’t know how to use the internet. I hated his class. 5/5”
And many more iterations of “this guy is terrible. 5 stars”
“Professor Stanford Pines once lept up onto a table in the middle of class to catch a bee that had gotten in, and then completely derailed class to talk about how great bees are. Amazing class i learned a lot. 5/5”
“Dr Pines has a twin brother who he occasionally mentions, and once a guy who looked IDENTICAL to Dr Pines taught instead. The class itself was fine (albeit with more swears) but it’s clear it was a totally different guy.”
“This professor doesn’t start grading until the end of the semester, grades extremely harsh, and answers all emails in a manner that is so untimely it borders on straight up disrespect. He talks about fairytales and monsters in such a way that im surprised he’s not an english major, but its clear he’s absolutely brilliant. I would never take his class again.”
“Doctor Pines is known for hard grading but that’s just because he has high expectations and wants his students to be curious and willing to seek help. As long as you bring even an ounce of interest into a conversation about science (either relating to the class topic or otherwise) he will match you 110%. Will answer any question very enthusiastically. Knows basically every scientific subject somehow?? Asked him for help on a paper on molecular structuring during office hours (that are for some reason held at 10-12 pm–that’s right, PM.) and he was very kind and thorough when he wasn’t going on tangents on the existence of hopefully-hypothetical shapeshifters. 5/5.”
“I’m not entirely convinced this man knows what computers are. He writes paper corrections with a quill. Might be a time traveling alchemist. 5/5.”
“Don’t draw triangles in the margins of your paper. He will shoot your test with a laser gun. He did let me disassemble and reassemble the gun after so I’m not mad about it. 5/5.”
“Hot. I think he thinks sexual attraction is a myth, unfortunately enough for me. 5/5.”
“love his energy but MAN can he sound condescending. there’s something about his voice… 4/5”
“I wish he would stop getting on to the tables and walking around on them while lecturing, half of my notes have mud prints on them now. At the very least he could wipe his boots off beforehand. That’s just common decency. Sit in the back and hope he doesn’t get to your table before the hour is up. 5/5”
“He’s insane. 5/5”
“once looked in his bag and there was a whole dead (?) owl in there. not sure what that was about. 3/5”
“For 6 months I’ve been stopping by and saying Hi to Dr Stanford whenever I see him around the business department, and for 6 months he’s been responding as normal and helping answer any pressing physics questions I have, 6 MONTHS I’ve talked to him in passing and in class, and only NOW do I discover that it turns out that the guy in the business department building is NOT Dr Stanford Pines, my physics professor, but is in fact the advanced BUSINESS professor, StanLEY Pines, his twin brother. For 6 MONTHS this man I have never had a class with was doing the voice and mannerisms of my physics teacher just to fuck with me. I would complain to someone but the guy was genuinely helpful when I asked questions about hypothetical physics and didn’t go off on tangents like Dr Pines would. Still don’t know how a business guy knows so much about physics. I give both of them 5 stars.”
Mmmm medication :) I love you medication. Modern medicine makes my life so much better. “Ohh you’re so young maybe you’ll want to taper off…” no thank you, I will keep taking the pills that resolve my symptoms :) thank you pharmacology I love you
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