(icon by @neladoesart)

Hi! I’m Natalie. I’m trans of gender and ace of sexual and I write dark fantasy and dark sci-fi adventure stories full of boners and thud-and-blunder action violence wherein no swash remains unbuckled, nor pot unboiled. I also blog about books and history and languages and I write essays and poetry sometimes, and don’t forget about the many exciting Age of Empires 2 scenarios available at Natalie’s Cool Website.

You might have heard my short story The Wishing Tree on the Tales to Terrify podcast! (now available as a zine from Grinning Kitten Press). Other stuff I’ve published to date includes:

THE LAST GIRL SCOUT: A post-apocalyptic wasteland adventure story and transbian romance about two women who fall in lesbians together and fight Nazis and draculas in the bombed-out ruins of Old America

LEAD AND ROSES: LOVE SONGS AT THE END OF THE WORLD: A collection of short fiction set within 23rd-century post-nuclear wasteland we’ve all come to know and love

IN THE COURT OF THE NAMELESS QUEEN: A collection of dark fantasy f/f erotica about sexy swashbuckling swordswomen (both cis and normal) and a giant scary monster lady in a far-off realm of adventure and dark magic.

If you’re curious I’d really like it if you’d check out my Patreon because there’s even more fantabulous treasures on there and you can subscribe for the low, low price of just one American dollar. Your one American dollar will go toward the ever topical “Natalie can make rent and doesn’t starve” philanthropy fund.

I’m gonna stay here on Tumblr until they forcibly remove me from the premises, but I’m also on Pillowfort, Bluesky, and Cohost

:)

Even if there is such a thing as general intelligence, which I’m not convinced there is, and even if it could be quantized or quantified, which I’m absolutely sure it couldn’t, then I would assume the segment of the population with the highest general intelligence would likely self-select to *not* have their intelligence quotient measured by paying a bunch of money to take a test widely known to be flawed in order to get into a smart-people club widely known to be bogus

Cursed firearm concept:

.22 rimfire caseless

When I was little I got lucky enough to develop a taste for reading on my own faster than the public school system could beat it out of me, which caused me to overperform in elementary school, which led all the adults around me to develop the idea that I was some sort of omnicompetent supergenius who didn’t experience problems. I had a hell of a time making it through high school b/c I’d be like “Hey, I can’t / don’t know how to do X Y and Z, can I like get a hand” and the adults would be like “Nooo you’re So Smart so clearly you’re only having problems because you’re Not Trying and Just Don’t Care. You being a genius, and all.” And I’d be like “Chief, I’m not sold on this whole ‘genius’ thing. I think I might just be, y'know, regular. Like a regular lady.” And they’d be like, “Oh, so you’re just Giving Up. Well, we can’t help you.”

We should all be more vulgar, I think. All of us should say words in the vein of “fuck” and “shit” and “goddamn” more often than we do.