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Mr.snack Attack

@maomaod

šŸ˜Œradioactiveā˜¢ļømarine biologistšŸ™šŸ’›I will bite šŸ¤ŗzombiešŸ«¦Your dadšŸ˜Žchat me upšŸ›¶

BEFORE YOU CLICK A LINK!

Reblog this post :) Especially if youā€™re on mobile, youā€™ll lose the post if you click the link without thinking. Take a note from your elders before you

Interesting note: It definitely uses whoever you're following now, not at that date. Even the 2020 one includes a lot of people I was absolutely not following yet in Feb 2020, which is actually kind of cool, I can see what they were reblogging from this fandom before I got into it.

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unfortunate series of events at the charity gala

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I love their friendship a lot. They're both lame in different ways but think they're respectively the cooler one. Failcore, both of them.

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Reblogged

Day 6: Things, Eyeliner

Sometimes, Stone just randomly showed up to work or events with his eyeliner on, and Ivo secretly likes it.

pioneering something called "gritted teeth optimism" where everything is gonna turn out okay even if i have to bite and claw and gnash my way through it

Andrea Gibson, Birthday

it seems the anti-football post made some people really mad. I just want to double down and say that I hate football and I wouldnā€™t wish playing football on my worst enemy <3 football is an evil ass blood sport and its diehard fans act like theyā€™re rabid. fuck football as a game and especially fuck varsity football. noooo nuance idgaf about ā€˜camaraderieā€™ or ā€˜the team spiritā€™ or ā€˜sense of accomplishmentā€™ or whatever. am stoned going on this posting spree but Iā€™m right about this. high impact sports are bad for children. and adults. but especially children who are not being paid for this and will deal with the consequences for the rest of their lives.

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This is the backstory for how Gritty adopted a new sidekick, right?

The kid throws down the gloves and Gritty picks him up and carries him off, this is beautiful, thank you for the link.

SO APPARENTLY THESE ARE DIFFERENT GAMES

The kid swinging his goalie stick (wider than normal sticks) seems to be from this one:

And you know what? Fair

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I need to remember I have a tumblr more often, anyways enjoy my stupid clown girl oc Pop!!

I need a sweet, delicate bottom to let me fuck all higher brain function out of them. Actually, just whichever one walks nearest to me next. I feel so pent up lately and I need to fuck load after load into a cumslut until they canā€™t say anything other than a slurred ā€œpleaseā€ and ā€œthank you.ā€ Fucking an adorable bottom into a drooling cum covered thoughtless fleshlight would cure me rn.

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I am finally taking my drivers test and I feel like Iā€™m going to puke

Do you think I can get the driving instructor to let me go to a drive through and get us Baja blasts

Didnā€™t even get out of the parking lot but I passed so now I can drive myself to get tacobell :)

If I had a car

ā€¦ā€¦ā€¦ā€¦ā€¦.yā€™all ready for Pesach?

Because this person certainly is!

My goyische fiance: ā€œIs this a prank?ā€ 

after being informed it is not:

ā€œAt that point you should just go outside and build a kosher hutā€ 

also

art becomes life I guess

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avital-mi-beit

Iā€™m sobbing this is a perfect addition

We knew this couple from our schul back in the day who had an issue with birds continually flying into their french window, so upon advice from an animal control expert they lined the outside of the window with foil as a measure to ward off the birds. 

I am not jewish so my presence is not relevant. However i am high. And i genuinely cant tell if this makes ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE WHATEVER because i am high or because im not jewish. Or are jewish holidays justā€¦. Like that.

Jewish people: this post

Me, a simple non jew who happens to be high as balls, sobbing: what the fuck does this mean

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unbidden-yidden

Yo @transenbyhollis that is an extremely fair question, high or not. 

For you and the rest of the peanut gallery, the joke here is honestlyā€¦. just kind of something you had to have lived through to really get? 

So you may be aware that many Jews (in particular, religious Jews, but some secular Jews also) keep the dietary laws known as kashrut. The really, really basic meaning of this is that we only eat meat from certain animals that has been slaughtered in a certain way, and we separate meat and dairy. How people observe this in practice varies a lot. If you follow the strict traditional rules, you have separate dishes, cookware, and ideally appliances for meat and dairy. However, there is a whole continuum of practices that are more lenient. 

In any event, for eight days a year, during the holiday of Pesach (Passover), those who keep kosher year-round (and even some who donā€™t) observe unique kashrut rules that involve removing all of the chametz (leavened grain products) from the household and oneā€™s diet. If one holds by traditional observance, ridding oneā€™s life of chametz in preparation for Pesach is a BIG deal, and includes a truly insane amount of cleaning and then the covering of surfaces that cannot be kashered. 

People literally clean for a month to be fully prepared. In fact, you know what? Iā€™m just gonna drop this here: https://www.chabad.org/holidays/passover/pesach_cdo/aid/664473/jewish/Printable-Passover-Guide-2019.htm

Itā€™s such an intensive process that once youā€™ve lived through it, it only makes sense to make jokes about it. Covering items that do not have and couldnā€™t even have food on them (see: the toilet paper) is hilariously over the top, but a good tension relief when youā€™re on your tenth hour of scrubbing your entire kitchen with a toothbrush to ensure that literally no cookie crumb has escaped. 

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unbidden-yidden

GUESS WHAT TIME IT IS AGAIN

Sudden mental image of a dude just taking a power washer to his kitchen

when i was a small child i (christian-raised) understood: Passover and Easter are two holidays that are around the same time of year but different; Easter is the Christian holiday celebrating Jesusā€™s return from the dead; Passover involves a ban on chametz and can involve observers throwing a lot of chamitz away. Young me came to the knowledgable conclusion that Jesus = chametz

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unbidden-yidden

How dare you leave this in the tags:

[Screenshot ID: tags from @kindigo

#christians: so easter is coming up #jews: *busy cleaning for pesach* love that for you. SARAH CHECK ON TOP OF THE CABINETS. I DONā€™T CARE GET A STOOL. #christians: ā€¦so have you heard about our lord and savior jesus christ #jews: YES EVEN THE TOILET PAPER. ALL OF IT. sorry im really busy. whatā€™s so special about this guy? #christians: he is risenā€“ #jews: *screaming* End ID]

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unbidden-yidden

Someone liked this post and therefore made it surface in my notifications again and uh. Rude reminder that Pesach is less than two weeks away šŸ˜³šŸ˜ØšŸ„²

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