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@librarianstebbs

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Reblogged xaiphafonese
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symbiote-spideypool

peter and wade are fighting side by side and when peter runs out of web fluid, he grabs a gun off wade’s belt and wade has this transcendent moment of i’m going to watch spiderman shoot my gun at a real live bad guy

but peter just fucking throws it at a bad guy’s face and knocks him out cold

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sensei-wrong

The impact causes the gun to go off and shoot wade in the dick. Spider man spends the next several minutes frantically apologizing while cable laughs his ass off for the first time in years.

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Pretty sure I’ve read this comic

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@wishem please omg just a quick doodle or something even

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I am sorry Cable looks like that

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mistermustachiogmc

Don’t you dare apologize for perfection.

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Reblogged xaiphafonese
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i think a lot of people hear the word ‘roadrunner’ and associate it immediately with the looney tunes character but uh. real roadrunners actually manage to look even stranger than the cartoon?

(x)

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goodbonestarot

Before my parents married my dad worked at a national guard base in Arizona that basically consisted of a bunch of “office buildings” made up of clusters of those long, thin pre-fab style tube houses. In the afternoons if it wasn’t too hot the guys in his building would open the doors on either end to get a breeze through. Apparently a local roadrunner took this as an open invitation and started coming in to “inspect” the offices each day/use the long hallway as an indoor runway. He go up and down the hallway stopping at each desk to see if anyone had anything tasty for him and then wander back out the other end and go about his roadrunner day. If they didn’t open the doors right away he’d just be hanging out, waiting outside the building until someone let him in. They are apparently highly curious (and also incredibly trusting) birds.

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this just made me so happy thank you for sharing your story

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Bonus Fun Facts: 

  • The closest relatives to roadrunners are Cuckoos
  • They run up to 26mph, only a bit slower than Usain Bolt!
  • Roadrunners are monogamous and form lifelong pair-bonds. 
  • They’re omnivores, but have a distinct fondness for meat eating mice, rats, snakes (including rattlesnakes), other birds eggs and babies, and sometimes young jackrabbits! 
  • They have two front-facing toes and two rear-facing toes.
  • Roadrunners are fully capable of flying, but since most of thier food is on the ground, they really only use it to get away from predators.
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Road runners at some Arizona rest stops take advantage of the giant windows on buildings. When other birds crash into the windows, the road runners jump them & will rip them apart. Imagine being a family stopping on a road trip & witnessing that scene. O_O

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Reblogged
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a fools guide to not wanting to die anymore

by me, a fool who doesnt wanna die anymore 

  1. never make a suicide joke again. yes this includes “i wanna die” as a figure of speech. swear off of it. actually make an effort to change how you think about things.
  2. find something to compliment someone for at least 4 times a day. notice the little things about the world that make you happy, and use that to make other people happy.
  3. talk to people. initiate conversation as often as you possibly can. keep your mind busy and you wont have to worry anymore
  4. picture the bad intrusive thoughts in youe head as an edgy 13 year old and tell them to go be emo somewhere else
  5. if someone makes you feel bad most of the time, stop talking to them. making yourself hang out with people who drain you is self harm. stop it.
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… 8|

That’s some pretty good advice. I don’t know what’s left of my humor after ‘guess I’ll just die’ jokes but it’s worth a shot.

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colacharm

Personally i went from “guess I’ll die” jokes to “IF I HAVE TO BE HERE FOR 5 MORE MINUTES I PROMISE YOU I WILL BUY JUST, AN ARRAY OF CLOTHES.” and other wild hyperbolic stuff. Just replace the death part with something ridiculous and off topic. Its very entertaining

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This also works with calling myself things like stupid, worthless, trash, etc. Even if you do this jokingly to yourself, your brain still believes it, and keeps up the cycle. Seriously, I found that when I stopped saying these things about myself, even jokingly, it made a massive difference.

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Here’s a tip I picked up from a friend that’s helped me a lot — replace self deprecating jokes with ironically self aggrandizing jokes

Like every time I trip and fall, instead of saying “l’m just a disaster human” I say “I’m the epitome of grace and beauty”

Or like, when I draw a picture I’m not 100% happy with, instead of saying “my art is trash” I say something like “you know I think it’s time we replaced the Mona Lisa”

When you do that you get to make a joke, but you’re ALSO getting practice building yourself up, y’know?

And eventually it becomes a reflex and you get so used to it that you can say nice stuff about yourself even when you AREN’T joking

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