hachama:
“inbabylontheywept:
“I am a 27 year old electrical engineer who works in a little secret lab in the middle of buttfuck Egypt. For one two month period, the office supply order changed from normal erasers to these, and I will not lie - every...

hachama:

inbabylontheywept:

I am a 27 year old electrical engineer who works in a little secret lab in the middle of buttfuck Egypt. For one two month period, the office supply order changed from normal erasers to these, and I will not lie - every time I thought I was alone, I would sneak one out of my desk and eat it. They looked delicious. Tasted mid, but the appearance was so stunning that my brain just kept thinking, surely, the rest were a fluke, but THIS TIME it will taste like fruit and sugar.

Anyway, eventually the order stopped, and I was very worried that somehow, they’d found out that I was eating their erasers. So I kind of casually brought it up to my manager that I was sad that they swapped the erasers out, and he was like “yeah, but I kept eating them so they couldn’t stay.”

I feel compelled to defend my profession, but I know the non-eraser-eating electrical engineers have our own fucked up-nesses

tsunamiwavesurfing:

6fft4-deactivated20240911:

tsunamiwavesurfing:

feel like ppl are getting meaner and it’s weird to see

how do you mean

bro forget this post for a second - i opened this app today at 9am and the first post i saw was you reblogging some horny shit about “sliding in and stretching her real good”. 9am on a wednesday. what was that all about?

knowyournewmeme:

“animal cr*ckers in my soup”

— surely temple

laughingpokemon:

duckbunny:

lapdogchase:

lapdogchase:

“nothing is real atoms never touch each other youve never touched anything in your life” ok. well when i pet my dog he is soft and when he licks my hand it is wet and that is far more real to me than whatevers going on at an atomic level

what my atoms are doing is their fucking business man i’m busy trying to stop my dog from eating tissues directly out of the box

nuclei don’t touch, but the nucleus is not the core of reality. reality is made of electrons dancing. reality is made of bonds.

you pet your dog and the atoms that are you brush up against the atoms that are him, and the electrons that are you press into the electrons that are him, and both of them change their movement.

electrons of course are not really particles and do not really move.

you pet your dog and the electron-orbitals of your skin overlap with the electron-orbitals of his fur, and both are changed by the contact. you are not made of little motes floating alone in a void. you are a single unfathomable chord formed of a trillion vibrations, and so is he. and the note you play is changing at every moment by what you touch and how you breathe, and so is his. and atoms do not really have edges, and to touch is to interact, and when you put your hand on your dog the universe does not know that you are separate. the song expands to hold you both.

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evilwizard:

terri-theslime13:

evilwizard:

krakoansam:

evilwizard:

meow-minola:

evilwizard:

welcome to my new app, UberFeats. i will send heroes to your house to commit great Feats of strength and cunning

Will they do my dishes?

they will Slay your dishes

What about the laundry?

they will Slay your laundry

what about the minotaur harassing my cows

they will Have Sex with the minotaur

uss-edsall:

uss-edsall:

one of the tabs open on my computer is this video and I think I might have a problem. I never close the tab and every time I look through my tabs during the day, I watch it again and link it to somebody to make them suffer

Thank you Brazilians for your service in making sure I know these lyrics

melonmortis:

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Original video is by SNOW SOS from TikTok

evilvillain123456789:

cats2019forthenintendoswitch:

teathattast:

evilvillain123456789:

teathattast:

dogwithpants:

teathattast:

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That’s this

Goes to show how little I know

The really crazy part is the Twitter post is the original and the tumblr post is the one that’s plagiarized

Net zero info ass post

We literally can see in both the screenshots that the tumblr post was posted first (also evilvillain123456789 lies recreationally, constantly) why are y'all so bad at fact-checking literally anything

Stop

rennebright:

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Mococo’s new outfit by Koahri [Twitter/X]
※Illustration shared with permission from the artist. If you like this artwork please support the artist by visiting the source.

jessaerys:

man. shoplifting in the 70s must have been so easy. no cameras in sight only living in the moment

lmaonade:

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whatever girl its midnight have a sweaty elf wip

hi I would really like to hear the story of you getting kicked out of a museum for being a 9/11 fan

Anonymous

rrivlet:

rrivlet:

Okay, so lets set the stage here. 9/11 happens. I’m pretty young at the time, and I don’t remember shit about it.

Several years pass. I don’t remember exactly how old I was, but I wasn’t even 10 yet. I develop an absurd obsession with Aviation Disasters. I watch a lot of Seconds from Disaster about this, eventually learning that Human Error is my least favorite cause of incidents because nothing funny happened to the plane.

However.

I learn about 9/11 in school and my first thought is “this is fuckin rad” because there was a big aviation disaster. I love that shit. I learn that this happened because it was deliberate. I then discard this information because it’s no longer necessary. Queue the start of my 9/11 Simulation Era.

I use everything. Boxes, cans, whatever is stackable. A few times, I make a cardboard airplane. My parents are none the wiser because they just think I love airplanes (which is true, but only part of it). This goes on for some time.

Now, the museum I mentioned in those tags was called the “Imaginarium” or something like that. Childrens interactive museum. Lotsa fun stuff, and my family took me there often. One of the things they have here (which is, of course, my favorite exhibit) is a flight simulator cabinet.

One day, my obaachan takes me to the Imaginarium. I take my time, perusing through all the exhibits, making the big bubble, playing with the air cannon, all that jazz. All the while, I’m SUPER excited to get to the end, where the flight sim is.

The flight sim is running some version of microsoft flight simulator and is locked on a cesna of some sort. It has fully functioning foot pedals, throttle, and flight control. I eat this shit up every time for as long as whoever is taking me will let me. You probably already know the shape of this.

The space they have you fly over is like, a small city with surrounding countryside. As luck would have it, the city has two buildings of remarkably similar height next to each other. Sure, I’m piloting a cesna and not a passenger liner, but I don’t care. I’m in the moment, I’m fucking crazed out of my tiny child MIND about 9/11, and I can do ANOTHER simulation. In my head, I’m the second plane. I get close enough to the ground (having played the simulator a lot, certainly enough to be familiar with the controls), and I set course, full throttle, for the Second Tower.

As I collide (and the plane bounces around because the game doesn’t do exploding planes for some reason lol), I say aloud, and very audibly, “Oh my god, they hit the second tower.” Or something to that effect.

It’s maybe been 5 or so years since 9/11, so while it’s not 100% fresh in peoples memories, it’s near the surface of a lot of people’s minds. The attendant at the counter not far from where I’m sitting looks at me after I say this, makes a 100% correct read on what I’m fucking doing and what’s going on, looks at my obaachan and tells her in no uncertain terms that we need to leave and that “this disrespect cannot be tolerated here.”

I don’t go to that museum again for many many years, and when I do finally return (for a field trip or something), the flight sim is gone.

But it’s okay because I pestered a great many of my caretakers (including my foster parent at one point) with my 9/11 sims, and I’d do it again in a fuckin caffeinated heartbeat.

Honestly, getting kicked out of that museum and losing access to that flight sim was my own personal 9/11

andre-moraph:

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HANDS OFF

junkyarded:

me when i remember that i can’t obliterate people with chain lightning at any time for any reason

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