a bunch of minority communities have this attitude that goes, like, "those outsiders don't get you like we do. they hate you. we don't hate you. you're one of us. you're safe here, with us." and every time it triggers a virulent antibody response in me. fuck off!! you don't know me!!! and i sure as shit don't feel safe among you lot!!!! it, like, turns a shared oppression into some cult shit and i hate it for that.
It also moves remarkably quickly from 'yes, all members of ingroup have a natural affinity with one another' to 'that person who disagrees with me isn't *really* a member of the ingroup; don't be like that person'
& of course 'that outsider who tries to warn you about the behavior of the ingroup is really just a person who secretly hates you'.