Their names are Kevin and Carol and they have socials! They live in a common area of a rural town (Yaraka, QLD) and have gone on to have children of their own to break into the local pub.

Engine is running

me when I'm 33

he made it

and we will be healed. and we are going to make it

Explaining to the server at local restaurant Sid’s Diner that he only wanted one patty—not two—dainty little man Carlos Villarreal reportedly ordered a single cheeseburger Thursday. “Oh dear, is this delicate fellow worried a burger with double meat would upset his tender tummy?” said onlooker Miles Friedmont, wondering aloud whether Villarreal was purchasing the diminutive sandwich not for himself but for a young child of poor appetite, or perhaps a bedridden relative unable to stomach anything more substantial.

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This is so utterly hairraisingly ridiculous that you wish she made that story up, but it is unfortunately true.

Tumblr's 2025 Sexiest Old Man

✨ ✨✨Mads Mikkelsen✨✨✨

Thank you everyone who participated!

Old Man Bracket Wrapped:

This has been so much fun, and you haven't seen the last of this blog! I'll be taking a break for a while, but I will reopen submissions later tonight. Stay tuned! Our next bracket(s) will likely be smaller, possibly themed, tournaments.

my favorite video of all time ever

Whaght are zey doing tu zis poor rat- [gasp] zat is PERVERGHTED ! ... WHAGHT ARE ZEY FILLING HIM WITZH? EE IZ GETTING TOO BIG! HOOOOHHHH...! OH MY GAHD STOP TOUCHING IM ! ZHIS IZ PERVERT BEHAVIOURE! HOOH! STOP IT! AUUW..... WHAT A TERRIBLE DEATH! SsTOP TOUCHING HEIM !

zis is like a medeval TOGHRTURE.

whathellwas even zat . OOOOO MY GAD. oh it- preetty cuute. OOOHHOOHOOHHOGGOOOHHHH OH MY GADDD THGAT WAS VEURY SCHARMING... OOH my gad he is DEAaaadddd... ohhh not ze daaaawwwg... ooooohhh nnooo you are feeling him wiz ze wader of ze hose...he iz also veury shcarming zey look veury cute like zis...i wont liiieee to yoU !

OH!

EWWELIKE A LAMBB...

FRRREAK.

MONSTAEUR

AAUOOUGGGHHH ZIS POOR ANEMAL. OOOOOOG

always so touching and vibrant when you remember people a hundred years ago had profound lives full of fun and love

my great grandparents met because they were both telephonist-telegraphists and they used to communicate in spoken morse code so that their kids wouldn’t understand the dirty jokes they were saying. And my great-aunt was telling me the other day about how her father would sit with his kids during stormy nights and hug them as they looked out the window and he pointed out how beautiful the lightning was. Because he didn’t want them to be afraid. It isn’t far away but it’s easy to forget that people are people are people

isn’t it cool that we still take silly pictures where we pretend to put our baby niece for sale or where we pretend to officiate a funeral on the beach? I think that’s neat

In one of my family’s old photo albums from around the 1910’s-20’s there’s a picture of a dog sitting on a chair and wearing a hat.

This is my great grandma and her friends on a beach in Connecticut in 1918.

some of my faves are the ones where people have a new outfit or car, maybe even a hot date or the squad’s looking good tonight and they just had to capture their own coolness on film

when i had to do the life-sized chess puzzle in bg3 i had gale and his ridiculously high INT score putzing around trying to figure out how to "take down the king in 2 moves or less" and then i got frustrated after like ten failed attempts (i'm bad at chess) so i had karlach smash the king piece with a hammer. and it fucking worked. it counted because it took two moves or less. i cannot imagine anything funnier than Gale of Waterdeep rubbing his beard and muttering and frowning at this chess puzzle right up until the 6'5" barbarian woman goes "take it down in 2 moves or less? bet" and just smashes it to pieces. gale is just left there like WHAT. THAT'S NOT HOW THE GAME WORKS. YOU CAN'T JUST-- COME ON.

What, the forest-dwelling entities with imperfect human mimicry who insinuate themselves into groups of hikers? Yeah, we had one of those. Clocked it immediately, of course. Honestly it kind of fell in that so-inept-it's-kind-of-charming range. We just played along until it'd had it's fill of marshmallows and shambled back into the treeline. We might have been violating some kind of killjoy wildlife contact best practices but what the hell, can't plan around every little thing. Why, what happened to you guys

these tags are gold omg

It's a misconception that the mimics are hunting humans when they trail along at the back of hiking groups.

In fact, the creature you'll find suddenly walking beside you and acting as if they've always been there is almost certainly a juvenile, as the adults lose the ability when they reach reproductive age.

Recent studies suggest the forest mimic is less like a preying mantis (mimicry as a hunting strategy) and more like a cuckoo (mimicry as a protective strategy for their young). Adult forest mimics will leave their offspring near a group of hikers while they forage during the day, and retrieve them near trailheads in the evening. Groups of hikers provide safety from predators and allow the parents of the species the freedom to forage more widely.

For this reason, the traditional advice to never let a mimic into your vehicle is still very important, as this would separate the young mimic from its mother. If a juvenile forest mimic does follow your group to the parking lot, you can keep it entertained with trail snacks, dad jokes, and simple goofs. The mother will usually collect them shortly before sunset.

When you notice the woods around the trailhead go silent and feel a sense of nameless foreboding, find an excuse to avert your attention from the juvenile so it can sneak back into the forest to rejoin its mother, convinced it's fooled another party of unsuspecting humans.

surprisingly wholesome takes from the cryptid community here

@monstrousproductions

dragons

DRAGONS LOCATED

i think me receiving more and more leaks/tips that start with "im about to get fired anyways, so..." is a pretty good recession indicator im ngl

"they brought back the dire wolf" they fucking made a GMO wolf with the millions they got from stupid idiot rich people investors who go googoogaga eyed over being told that the company could "bring back" extinct animals if some rich idiots gave them millions of dollars.

WHAT ABOUT THE BUGS. WHAT ABOUT OUR AMPHIBIANS. WOOLY MICE WON'T SAVE HUMANITY.

everyone who is optimistic and hopeful about Colossal Biosciences, you're very kind and sweet. I'm not. I think they're asshole, they're grifters, they want to make as much money as possible and peddle it as saving the earth (Elon Musk ringing a bell) while helping plunder the working class of their wealth so that they can keep making rich people things for rich people, which in turn acts as a mask and as cheap entertainment for the working class.

no tech startup is going to save us. no billionaire is going to save us. no millionaire. we need to save ourselves.

cool and awesome. their goal is to privatize animal conservation BTW.

What if you went grocery shopping and the produce section was just missing?

Cuz my local Food Lion hid the produce section from me

Bethesda ass grocery store 😡😡😡