He/Him, Queer NB Pizza Delivery Witch who also writes sometimes, old enough to run for president, every original fiction story I write is under a creative commons sharealike license unless otherwise stated
As a note, all of my ficlets are to be considered written under the creative commons sharealike license, which is viewable here, but the answer to your question is: yes, so long as you credit me and license that work under the same terms.
Fic based on this prompt: It’s 3 AM and you are heading to the kitchen to consume the shredded cheese as usual. Unusually, a wizard in full robes is there, already eating the cheese. (Published January 24 2019)
Fic based on this prompt: The strongest warlock in all the land uses his power to constantly kidnap the princess. Most people believe it’s because he’s in love with her, but they have it all wrong. He’s in love with the knight who always comes to save her. (Published March 18 2019)
Fic based on this prompt: You drop a small piece of food on the floor, and decide to kick it under the oven/couch/whatever because you can’t be bothered to pick it up. As you’re walking away, you hear a very quiet “Thank you!” from under it. (Published April 3 2019)
Fic based on this prompt: You’re a witch who makes a living selling potions, breaking hexes, etc. You seem like a regular shopkeep, but, if someone can give you the correct code-word, they can buy illegal love potions from your store, instantly making the recipiant fall madly in love with the customer…Or at least that’s what would happen if you hadn’t started partnering with the FBI soon after you opened the store. Write about your first sting. [Please note that this fic starts with a trigger warning about the topics of consent, more detailed at the link. I’ll happily answer questions about it if you need to know more before reading.] (Published April 11 2019)
Fic based on this prompt: Explain how you try to calm down a newly turned vampire who was beyond pissed and ready to throw down at the vampire who turned them into a vampire because now they can’t eat their precious garlic bread anymore. (Published April 22 2019)
Fic based on this prompt: After beating the hero near death, the villain is finally told that the hero isn’t even 18 yet. Now the villain is taking the hero to go fight the gods who had sent him, looking to stop them from endangering kids for their own benefit. (Published April 30 2019)
Fic based on this prompt: You are back in your hometown for the weekend, and run into your long lost love. You are both happily in a relationship now but while you sit for a coffee and laugh about the old times, he suddenly gets very serious and says “it’s still you, you know? The person I see by my side, at the end of the day”. And your heart stops. (Published May 23 2019)
Fic based on this prompt: You live with a Vampire. Every Saturday, you give them a cup of your blood, and they cook you a nice meal. (Published September 9 2019)
Fic based on this prompt: You’d known, intellectually, that your heroic nemesis was a teenager, but it didn’t really sink in until the day their school called because your number was the only one on their emergency contact list. (Published March 20 2020)
Fic based on this prompt: You are a human in world were all of the cryptic creatures you’ve ever known are real, every year there is a reunion where all of the local cryptics reunite and have a chance to talk with the humans.This year for some reason you received an invitation to be the host of the ceremony, however, this is a position that only cryptids can have. Your neighbors all have the same invitations, that’s were you notice, you are the only human in a neighborhood of shape-shifters. (Published April 15, 2020)
Fic based on this prompt: You are the completely ordinary secretary to a team of superheroes, and the only person who knows their secret identities, hideouts, etc. What happens when the supervillains find out about you? (Published August 24, 2020)
Fic based on this prompt: You’re a daycare worker, watching over toddlers, when the imminent end of the world is announced. It becomes increasingly clear none of the kids’ parents are going to show up as the end inches nearer. (Published October 27, 2020)
Fic based on this prompt: You’re a mimic. You were disguised as a chair in a dungeon when an adventurer decided to take you as loot. You’ve actually enjoyed your life ever since as furniture in a jolly tavern. So when some ruffians try to rob the now-elderly adventurer’s business, you finally reveal yourself. (Published October 20, 2021)
Fic based on this prompt:
After a bad crash you’ve found yourself drifting through space, but your suit says you ran out of oxygen an hour ago.
(Published June 30, 2022.)
Unprompted fic: Time Travel and YOU -This fic is a short, informative pamphlet from Tempus, Inc regarding your selection to their lucrative and fascinating and only somewhat dangerous time travel program. There are some mentions of horrific injuries, but nothing described in detail. (Published July 12, 2022)
Fic based on this prompt:
You’ve just joined an adventuring party. The rogue wordlessly
gives you a handkerchief and slinks away. “Ah, it’s his way of handling
his kleptomania. Instead of stealing things at random, he’ll be going
specifically for that.”
(Published February 13, 2023) (I accidentally genderswapped the rogue.)
Fic based on this prompt:
After watching the world end thousands of times across multiple
timelines, you realise the only way to prevent Armageddon is to stop
yourself being born. You vow to let world end in the most ridiculous way
possible, because screw that.
(Published July 27, 2023)
Fic based on this prompt:
You were the caretaker for the mythical beasts of the royal
family. Yesterday they decided to replace you with some incompetent
noble, before kicking you out of the castle. You then spent the night in
a nearby forest. However today you were awakened by the beasts who
chose to follow you. (Published April 16, 2024)
Poem based on no prompt: this is a poem about growing up being told you could be beautiful if you just tried and uh how that really wasn’t true for me. It talks about fatphobia, bad self-imagery, there’s gory imagery and language, and references to self-harm (they’re kind of inferred, but it’s there). (Published November 15, 2024)
(ETA: If you’ve done an audio version of one of my stories, because there’s been a lot, please throw a link in the replies. I’ll eventually get around to putting them up here and people can check and find them before I do, or I might do a separate master post for that. :D 07/27/23)
Wanna Support Me?
If you want to help a guy out, you can head over to my ko-fi (also big thanks to everybody who’s ever helped out, you guys are amazing)
I still have a Patreon, I plan on refitting it for longer form pieces that are less suited to tumblr. Not doing much with it at the moment, because in these pandemic times I don’t wanna put anything behind a paywall, but if you want to support me a little bit on a recurring basis, that’d be the place to do it. (ETA: I think now you can also do that on ko-fi! 07/27/23)
I’m eventually going to finish the novel I started on it, but in all honesty I wrote myself into a corner on that one and need to figure out what I’m going to do next. It’s all still up and it’s public and free, and if anybody wants to give me some feedback, it’s there. (ETA: This is backburnered for a project I’ve been working on for a few years now that I think I’m nearly ready to start talking about publicly. 07/27/23)
If you can’t help me out financially, I totally understand, the other way to support me is to reblog it so that others can see it.
[Image description: the first image is a photograph of a large dog sitting in OP’s wheelchair. The second image is a screenshot of a comment reading “Disservice Dog”. End description]
Hi there, this is Bix. If you don’t know me, I’m a writer who’s disabled and can’t work, you’ve probably read some of my stuff like the one about the daycare worker at the end of the world, or the Time Travel and You story. Since April is apparently national poetry month, I wanted to put mention that I wrote one- The Ugly Duckling Never Sat Right With Me (do mind the warnings, it is a bit of a bloody poem and has some dark themes, there’s more about that at the link.)
Anyway, I really could use some help paying my bills and getting groceries. I know things are tight, I do not want anybody to feel bad if they can’t help, and I never, ever want someone’s last dollar. If you have a little extra and you’d like to share, though, I sure would appreciate it, and it’ll help me keep the cats fed. What also really helps is just reblogging this and helping me get more people to look at it.
You can also sign up to support me monthly over at my ko-fi, if you want to toss me five bucks a month to help keep the lights on that would be amazing.
when you go to bed significantly earlier than usual, a little menu should pop up asking if you want Wake Up Early or More Sleep. and then you should get what you requested. that’s my human body UI improvement for the day.
when I was like ten I was walking back from the chip shop near my gran’s house with a neighbour and we took a short cut down an alley which was enclosed by garages except for one part which was wire fenced and led to the electricity shack
and while I was walking I chucked a chip over the fence. the girl walking with me, C, reasonably asks why I did that
“oh, don’t you know?” I say, as if I’m not equally out of my own loop
she shakes her head. the enclosed alleyway has no streetlights. it’s after dark. the shack is isolated in the distance.
“a little girl who lived up on the court climbed the fence once on a dare. she went up to the shack and touched it, but there was a wire sticking out, and when she touched it, she got electrocuted and died, right there. if you come back in the daylight, you can still see the black mark.”
[editor’s note: the court was the smaller road off the side of the crescent, which was the one C’s family and my gran lived on. the houses there were slightly more expensive and newer, almost all occupied by wealthy commuters to the city, where most of the crescent houses were occupied by retirees and locals who worked on the trading estate. naturally, crescent kids hated the court. houses there got bricked about once a month.]
“no she didn’t,” C says
I made up this story for absolutely no reason and with no plan, but I’m not gonna back down now. “sure she did. and if you go past on your way back from the shops and you don’t leave her an offering, she’ll follow you home through the streetlights. one flickers behind you, then the next, then the next, until you get home. and then the lights start to flocked inside the house. even if you turn out all the electrics before bed, it’ll be too late. she’s inside. and you’ll wake up on the night and see her, and she’ll be so awful to see it’ll stop your heart.”
[editor’s note: the streetlights always flickered. this was because our neighbour monkey george kept setting the junction boxes on fire]
“I never did before and she never followed me home!”
“do you come down the alley after dark? or do you take the main road with the streetlights?” I knew she didn’t use the shortcut, because I’d been the one to talk her into it that night. she was three years younger than me and scared of the dark.
C claims not to believe me, but she throws a chip over the fence too, and walks the rest of the way looking over her shoulder. I get to pride myself for the night on being good at scary stories, and don’t think much more about it.
fast forward six or seven years. I’m back in town. I’m on my way back from the chip shop, taking the same shortcut home. ahead of me on the road are a couple of kids I vaguely recognise as old playmates’ younger siblings.
they stop, and I watch one fish out three sweeties from the pack they’re sharing. they take one each and throw them over the fence. they carry on walking.
I realise that this is probably my fault, as are any resulting pest control issues around the old electricity shack.
I just noticed my darling baby boy (cat) sitting in his little loft bed about 5 inches away from the most delightful sunbeam, so I scooted it into the sunlight for him and he looked me with the biggest widest expression. I don’t think he knew that was an option. I think I just blew his whole little mind
One of my favorite things about Put Baby In Pelican Mouth is that not only does the pelican have the intelligence necessary to speak human language but also knows how to lie, suggesting it has a theory of mind, yet not enough to understand that no one is going to put baby in pelican mouth.
To be entirely fair to the pelican, I have seen humans do much, much dumber things with their infants. The park rangers in Louisiana ha e to regularly tell people to not put their babies on the ground next to the gators for a pic.
In fact, it could be argued that the peculiar grammar used by the pelican in the Put Baby In Pelican Mouth post is deliberate, like how phishers use major grammar errors in their messages so that people too smart for the scam (or smart enough to report them) ignore the emails and the scammer can focus on the most likely marks.
Regardless, the pelican is right: there is absolutely someone dumb enough to put a baby in its mouth because it asked politely. Probably dozens on that beach alone.
Put baby in pelican mouth for Instagram photo. Facebook photo of baby in pelican mouth for many likes and also happy asleep baby. So cute baby in pelican mouth for video on TikTok. Youtube short of baby so cute in soft pelican mouth for so many views to Youtube channel. Baby in pelican mouth challenge.
ALT