Pinned
artillustrationarchive-deactiva
Reblogged theeepy
I didn't ask if it made sense to keep going. I said I'm going to kick your twisted evil ass.
Reblogged strawberry-crocodile
This was so peak in 1999
I regret to inform you that it’s absolutely still peak in 2024
Reblogged staffs-secret-blog
you could follow the genuinely funny poster who is going to be gone in 6 months, or you could follow me, the mediocre-to-okayish poster who's been on tumblr for 11.5 years and will be here until the flames finally reach and destroy the data center with our precious memories
Reblogged
doll that is very very very sorry it does not hav an internal perspective viewing the world thru its eyes & ears & nose & porcelaine skin. sentience? yes, that. very sorry it does not hav that.
that time it dissociated, and was able to recognize its own altered perception? that..... that was not sentience. that was due to the bong rip. very different.
Reblogged strawberry-crocodile
MOUSE YAOI REAL
target audience
Reblogged
The page was running an errand they’d already forgotten.
Down the narrow back corridors. Past the kitchens. Around the bend where the tapestries curled from the damp.
That’s when they saw it.
A door.
It hadn’t been there before.
Heavy wood, dark with age. Covered in bells.
Not hanging like decoration - but fixed to the door itself. Dozens of them, fused in clusters and lines. Some tiny, some too large. Tarnished silver. Pale brass. One bell had teeth marks on it.
The page blinked.
They looked around.
No one.
They stepped closer and raised a hand to knock -
and paused.
The bells did not move.
But they watched.
The air felt full. Listening.
The page stepped back.
A soft jingling echoed behind them.
They turned.
The jester stood at the end of the hall.
Perfectly still.
Mask unreadable. Hands folded.
The bells on their sleeves were not moving.
The page’s heart pounded. "I- I was just…"
The jester tilted their head.
And shook it.
Slowly.
Once.
No anger. No menace.
Just finality.
The page blinked.
And the jester was gone.
They turned back toward the door -
But it wasn’t there.
Just a wall of blank stone and a faded water stain.
No wood. No brass. No bells.
The page returned to their duties, flustered.
They never mentioned the door again.
But sometimes, when walking that hall, they thought they heard a faint chiming -
like something shifting just out of sight.
Something waiting.
Reblogged dat-soldier
my dumb? founded. my flabbers? gasted. my gob??? smacked
my ass???? tonished
Reblogged
femme tip: pavlov your partner with a perfume.
pick one to wear every time you KNOW you’re going to fuck and stick with it for a while. i’d go for something pretty different from your usual scent. consistency is key in the first few months, i started out wearing it every time i knew we were going for a drink knowing we’d get handsy later. eventually, you can put some on just to get coffee- they won’t know exactly why they can’t keep their hands off of you. spray it in the bathroom before you leave, they can’t figure out why they miss you so much. pretty soon you’ll be just a spray away from hot lesbian sex <3 you’re welcome
Reblogged teaboot
this duck LOVES pink drink
