i think the funniest thing I have ever forgotten to tell someone was that the boat he was applying to work on mandates their employees do the hokey-pokey
imagine you are me. your friend and temporary coworker, a reserved guy who walks with the grace of a jaguar and lives alone in the forest, is applying to work on another boat. he has it narrowed down to two choices, and he thinks he likes the style of one of the captains over the other. he is going to pick that boat. you feel very strongly he should NOT pick that boat. why, he says. you don’t know how to answer, except to say that he would not be a good fit. he says he wants something easy and laid back. you watch him go, and it is only two weeks later that you bolt upright in bed and Remember
very big fan of when shows put wigs on actors and say ‘yeah. That’s him when he was younger fuck you’. No anti aging ai, no teen actor hired. Just. The same guy with a fuckass wig
Prince Jing telling everyone NOT to mention Li Yu’s whole inability to do up his hair or wear his robes properly is hilarious to me. Because on one hand, this is a considerate way of ensuring no one makes his carp spirit feel bad about not knowing human customs. On the other hand, it also ensures no one stops his slutty, slutty carp spirit crush from being less slutty
so. um. the good news is we found your boyfriend. the bad news is that, well, we sort of…dug him up…in the middle of a car park. in leicester (buckley et al. 2013). leicester, yeah. sorry. they demolished the friary he was hastily interred in when henry viii dissolved all the monasteries. you know how it is. and as it turns out, well, shakespeare was…sort of right about him. scoliosis, yeah, sorry (appleby et al. 2014). if it makes you feel any better we analysed his bones and it turns out he had a pretty high-protein diet before he died (lamb et al. 2014). and he drank so much wine that it changed their chemical composition, which we didn’t know could actually happen before we analysed him (lamb et al. 2014), so he was having a good time, at least.
BIBLIOGRAPHY
Appleby, J., Mitchell, P.D., Robinson, C., Brough, A., Rutty, G., and Morgan, B. (2014). The scoliosis of Richard III, last Plantagenet King of England: diagnosis and clinical significance. Lancet 383, 1944.
Buckley, R., Morris, M., Appleby, J., King, T., O’Sullivan, D., and Foxhall, L. (2013). ‘The king in the car park’: new light on the death and burial of Richard III in the Grey Friars church, Leicester, in 1485. Antiquity 87, pp. 519-538.
Lamb, A.L., Evans, J.E., Buckley, R., and Appleby, J. (2014). Multi-isotope analysis demonstrates significant lifestyle changes in King Richard III. Journal of Archaeological Science 50, pp. 559-565.
This post legitimately knocked me out of a doomscroll. Had to put down my phone and everything and stare at a wall.
I really do regret my inaction the most. Every time. All of my future problems are always caused by things I failed to do in the present. And every time, I get so mad at past Me for not even trying because I’m so afraid to fail.
Like. Damn. Didn’t expect pixel art of some planets to hit me so hard.
ok i just got this thought out of nowhere but blog divers (people who scroll through a blog and reblog things that were posted YEARS AGO) are actually a super important part of the tumblr ecosystem
With people going inactive and deactivating, a lot of classic tumblr posts and also missed gems get lost because those connections get broken. Even on my own blog I forget about posts I made until I see someone in my activity reblog one of them- which then inspires me to reblog it myself because it was a good post and I want my new followers to see
do not feel bad about diving through someone’s blog and reblogging shit from years ago, it keeps dashboards alive
(and if anyone has a problem with that, they can just block you or they can delete the root post ¯\_(ツ)_/¯, two things that have absolutely no effect on the grand scheme of our lives)
Cycling nutrients (old tumblr posts) from the ocean floor (mutual’s blog archive) to increase (dashboard) ecosystem productivity
Whale Fall Scavengers Spreading Vital Nutrients From The Surface Back Into The Ecosystem
There are many benefits to being a tumblarine biologist.
